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  • Writer's pictureFriedhelm (Counsellor)


Updated: Jan 29, 2019

Ever had the pleasure of having your dentist perform a root canal? And how did that work for you? You probably tried to get out of that chair. Why the need to go so deep?

If you reject the advice of the dentist and rather settle for a normal filling, you will find the answer to the question yourself, I would guess rather quickly. Before long you will be begging him for a root canal and he will probably charge you for both appointments.

When we are overwhelmed by intense negative feelings or are hurting badly, it likewise drives us to tears, anguish and dismay. It takes us to a bad place. It leaves us in a state of confusion, bewilderment and often desperation. People feel powerless and don’t know what to do. Some go on the offensive. Others flee or hide. Whatever they try, it does not take the pain away. Nothing seems to work. It rather gets worse.

Do you remember? There once was with Adam and Eve a sad sad situation and since then we all have many bad bad feelings. If there is a problem in the core of the fruit, how do we fix it?

“What if”? What if you pull out the worm and kill it? What if you patch up the hole? What if you don’t do anything? You see where this is going? Now ask the right question: What if we kill the worm, open up the bad part, go as deep as is needed and cut out the rot to the core?

A buzz word among relationship experts is the term “emotional awareness”. They say, if we are not emotional aware, we will end up getting the opposite of what we want. One should actually qualify this and add: If you are not aware of the root of your feelings, you cannot heal the soul and take away the pain.

According to the Biblical narrative of creation, there once was a sad sad situation and since then we all have many bad bad feelings. The root, the first or original negative feelings we had, were fear, guilt and shame. After their disobedience, Adam and Eve feared God, they blamed each other and hid themselves for they were ashamed. The idea that we deal with a root that produces bad feelings like a tree produces many fruits, is also found in the New Testament where the apostle Paul uses the term a “root of bitterness” (Hebr. 12:15).

All this means that if you want relief of the pain and feeling awkward, it is not enough to be aware of your undefined feelings or general discomfort. It is not even enough that you are aware of what the name of the feeling is, that torments you. It is vital to become aware of the root or foundation of those feelings. That name is the one you need. That is the feeling you want to face, tackle and conquer. That is the place from where the evil comes from. That is the malignancy that has to be healed.

Looking for a method to get there? You will eventually get to the bottom of your emotional hell, if you keep on asking yourself the following question: “What would happen if...?” There you will find one of the big three negative emotions namely fear, guilt or shame.

Want proof of the truth of your discovery? Easy. Have a good look at the story of your life.

Recall the defining moments in your life. One of the big three is there. Too obvious to miss.

Ready for a root canal?


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