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  • Writer's pictureFriedhelm (Counsellor)


Updated: Jan 16, 2019

A question so often asked, but so widely misunderstood. What did he or she really wanted to know when he or she asked the question? Or what did you mean when you said to someone: "I love you?" What did you understand when he or she answered: "Yes, I love you". Furthermore: What are your expectations afterwards? Surely age also has to do with what we understand and imply when we ask this question. The meaning of love for a 20 year old is different than for a sixty year old.

Things go wrong because love means many things to many people. But for many years everybody believed we are all on the same page. Well, we are not and our ignorance has grave consequence.

Only when our love relationship grinds to a screeching halt and our marriage is in crisis we are forced to rethink the meaning of this word that we so frequently use or have heard so many times from someone who eventually disappoint us. By the time we are married, settled, have big responsibilities - about in the middle years - our love boat suddenly threatens to sink. High drama. Everybody around us is affected when this happens

I want you to see that this is the perfect time to learn about true love. Then we are forced to learn. We don't really pay attention before that. We are not ready. When our lives fall apart, the adult and responsible person seeks professional help. And that is a good thing. For then for the first time we acquire an understanding of what love really means.

Thus for the very young couple getting married, the message of my wedding sermons are simply: Your marriage will be great and last forever. The joy, love and happiness you feel today, is like a kiss never-ending. It's all sunshine and roses. You have arrived in the land of milk and honey. (But here is my calling card just in case you need me - call me! call me!)

Let's stay here for ever and just kiss.


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The answer to the question: What is love? can really become complicated and even confusing. However the question: How does love feel? is for most people a much more interesting one. I believe there ar


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